How To Celebrate Thanksgivukkah

Photo via http://thanksgivukkahboston.com

There is something special happening this Thanksgiving that won't happen again for another 70,000+ years.  The first day of Hannukah falls on Thanksgiving, creating what many are calling "Thanksgivukkah."  Since we are celebrating Thanksgiving at my mom's house this year, who is not Jewish (I am a convert), I have been thinking about how I will incorporate some Hannukah traditions into the day for my kids, while still honoring the Thanksgiving holiday that is so special to my mom.  

The simplest way to do this is through food.  My family associates specific foods with Thanskgiving (grandma's sweet potatoes, stuffing, mashed potatoes) and Hannukah (potato latkes, gelt, jelly doughnuts).  My kids asked me last week if they could have latkes on Thanksgiving (they are not fans of mashed potatoes), and I thought "Why not?"  After thinking about what I will contribute to our Thankgiving table, I realize it is going to be a mash up of flavors from both holidays.  Sweet potato latkes and Grandma's sweet potatoes will fill the spread.  How about pumpkin pie and my daughter's and my new creation of "jelly" cupcakes (our take on sufganiyot)?  At Thanksgiving, when we are all stuffing ourselves to the brim, why not add a few more dishes to the mix?  This article from The New York Daily News shares some fantastic inspiration for your menu if you are celebrating both holidays this year.

Beyond food, there is a great opportunity with the junction of these two holidays to talk about freedom. The Pilgrims were seeking religious freedom, and the Maccabees were also fighting for theirs.  Just as I always ensure gratitude never gets lost in between the stuffing and mashed potatoes at Thanksgiving, I will add in some new activities this year to incorporate the theme of freedom, and encourage my family to express their gratitude for it.  Here are a few that I have in mind:

• Light it up: When we light the second Hanukkah candle on Thanksgiving evening, I will ask everyone to share what they are thankful for (a new twist on an annual tradition I do during Thanksgiving).

• Freedom placemats: I will give everyone a blank paper placemat to express what freedom means to them.  Then, everyone can hold up their placemats and share as we go around the table.

• Read and discuss: I have a great book called Maccabee!: The Story of Hannukah.  This year, when I read it, I will ask my kids what the Pilgrims and Maccabees have in common and use it as a starting point for discussion about the fusion of Thanksgiving and Hannukah this year.

Jewish or not, consider reflecting on the themes of gratitude and freedom this Thanksgiving and how you might express it at your holiday table.  Happy Thanksgivukkah!  

How To Teach Being Thankful

Thanksgiving is the perfect time of year to focus on celebrating gratitude.  I aim to do this every day, (both with myself and my children), but step it up a bit this month in honor of the holiday that inspires thanks.  This year, I am using the timing as a way to kick off some new rituals in my house.  Here are a few ideas to get your kids thinking about what it means to be thankful.

Gratitude poster: Tape up a piece of butcher paper (a poster board, dry erase board, or chalkboard would work well too).  Give each person in the family a different color marker or piece of chalk.  Each day, have everyone write down one thing they are thankful for that day.  At the end of the month, have each person read their entries (color coded) and appreciate the gratitude in their life.

Share: Portion off a percentage of your child's weekly allowance (if they don't receive allowance, consider allocating a monthly amount for this exercise), and select one charity together as a family to donate to for the month.  The family can brainstorm and research charities together.

Family Gratitude Journal: Each night, have each person in the family dictate (while you write) or have each person write down one thing they are thankful for that day.  On New Year's Day, sit down and read the book together.  I am launching this one this New Year's Eve!

For other ideas on how to celebrate thanks and giving all year round, click here to read an earlier post on VeegMama on this topic.

Changed For Good: Musings On My First Decade of Motherhood

2013 Goofyfoot Photography

My oldest daughter turns 10 today.  Ten.  Wow, that number blows me away.  I could go on and on about the amazing, beautiful young lady my Gabriela is at ten years old, and the even more amazing, gifted human being I can see her becoming.  As I reflect on all the ways my daughter has grown in the past year and since she was born, I am struck by the realization that today also marks a decade that I have been a mother.

As I take a pause to let that settle in - 10 years of motherhood - I almost gasp at the difference between the person I was then and the woman I am today.  I wanted to be a mom ever since I can remember.  I daydreamed of the Girl Scout meetings I would lead, the birthday parties I would host, and the mommy and me groups my babes and I would join.  I looked forward to planning play dates, packing school lunches, and organizing family trips.  I nurtured fantasies about eating delicious dinners and helping with homework.  I read every parenting book I could get my hands on when I was pregnant.  I had a "baby binder," to organize every piece of information I could possibly need.  I had charts and spreadsheets about how I would organize my new life as working mom.  I had it all under control and I knew it all.  I was wound tight (okay, I still am, but a lot less), a woman on a mission (now on a quest for joyful living vs reaching the next goal), with a plan for everything (I now have surrendered to the fact that there is no such thing).  

Ten years later, as I take stock of where I am today, I realize more than anything, that I never could have anticipated the gifts of self discovery and exploration that motherhood would bring.  I never expected the influence my kids would have on the person I would become.  Ten years ago, motherhood was my destination and finish line.  Today, it is a guiding light on my journey of self discovery that I didn't even realize I was taking.  

When I became a mother, my goals were laid out and I was on track to accomplish them all.  In "Stephanie' World," I could do it all - lead a high power career; be the "perfect" mother who volunteers at school and manages her family effortlessly; be the Martha Stewart wife who has gourmet meals on the table every night.  Over the past ten years, I have tried to do it all - and I did so valiantly for quite some time, until I realized that "living the dream" didn't feel as joyful as it did in my "plans."  Over the past ten years, I have had to simplify, and let go of some things in order to a better person for my family.  I have learned slowly that it is more important (and it is okay) to do the things that bring me joy, as opposed to the things that I thought I was supposed to do in order to embody the unattainable ideal of perfect mother.  I have learned that there is no award for perfect mom.  Instead, my goal is to have loving, happy children who enjoy me and want to spend time with me.  In order to earn that, I have learned that I must slow down, enjoy the present more, and live in the moment.

The past ten years haven't always been pretty, and I have made many mistakes.  I have risen and fallen, held on and let go.  I realize now that it was all necessary to get me to this almost-perfect, never-ending place of "in progress."  Watching mommy figure this all out must not have always been fun for my kids.  I am so grateful for their resilience as they have weathered the storms I have gone through towards becoming my best self and living my best life.  

I wouldn't be half the person I am today without my little munchkins, who have shown me the light in so many ways.  My Gaby, who is my "mini me," has become my mirror.  I cringe sometimes at the things she says or the ways she acts, seeing the ugliest parts of myself, the things I most want to change, as she mimics her "hero."  But then, these moments are special gifts too.  She gives me the nudges I need to check myself and do better.  

Gaby is the reason I am writing again, because she reunited me with my favorite children's books, and reminded me that I love to write and used to write all the time.  She connected me with a children's writing community that I never would have found without her own interest in writing.

I never would have gone down a vegan path if it weren't for my kids - wanting to live better and eat better so our planet and I would be healthy to take care of them for many, many years.   

And I never would have had this dying urge to find the joy and beauty in the everyday, without those three little people inspiring me.  They set me on my journey towards "the good life" and they are the inspiration for this blog.  

There is a song in one of my favorite Broadway musicals, Wicked, called "For Good."  I always fall apart when hearing it, because it makes me think of my kids and their impact on me.  I always thought I would be the one guiding them on their path, but as it turns out, they were the ones guiding me all along.  I think the lyrics say it well.

I've heard it said
That people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led
To those who help us most to grow
If we let them
And we help them in return
Well, I don't know if I believe that's true
But I know I'm who I am today
Because I knew you.
Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you
I have been changed for good.

Gaby, I know it is true when I say, "Because of you, I have been changed for good.  Happy birthday, baby."

My Favorite DIY Costumes for Halloween

Can you believe Halloween is just around the corner?  My family and I start planning our costumes in the summer.  We usually do a family theme, but this year, my girls want to do their own thing, (sigh...they have grown past that age).  My husband and I plan to do a Star Wars theme with my little guy (he's dying to be Luke Skywalker), but I am a bit disappointed we won't be donning one of the fun homemade theme ideas we brainstormed.  

Growing up, my mom always made our Halloween costumes.  I was lucky to have a crafty and seamstress mom who could whip up amazing creations.  Unfortunately, that sewing giftedness didn't filter down to me, but I love the idea of making my own costume...if only I had more time!  Alas, this year, I purchased our family's costumes, but I still marvel at those who create theirs on their own.  Below are a few of my favorite DIY Halloween costume ideas, some that friends and family have done in the past, and some that my own fam has considered doing.

Words With Friends Tiles - My husband is addicted to this game app, so it was no surprise to me that he came up with this one.  All you need are some cardboard boxes or large squares of cardboard, and some paint.  Paint on the letters and attach a "handle" to hang over you.  Voila - you are part of the game!

Legos - My sister-in-law and her family created this ingenious costume.  It is one of my favorites.  Boxes, Solo cups and paint.  Coordinate with matching sweats, hats, and t-shirts.  That's it!

M&M's - This is an old family favorite.  My sis-in-law made this costume from felt.  It requires a little sewing know-how, but I think even I could pull this one off!  Pair with white tights and gloves and you are all set.

Photo via http://imperfectandfabulous.blogspot.com

Box Cars - These Disney themed cars are literally made from boxes.  All you need is a little creativity and drawing skills, some paint and scissors to make these characters come alive.  


Do you have a DIY costume that you'd like to share?  I would love to add it to my list.  Send me a note in the comments section below.  Happy costume planning!

Time To Bond!

Two weeks ago, I had the pleasure and fun of leading my oldest daughter's troop and their moms on a mother-daughter retreat in Big Bear. This was a year in the making and lots of work, but it was worth every minute.  It truly is the simple things in life that are the best, and the one-on-one time with my oldest, as well as the time spent with other moms, was enriching and invigorating.  It recharged my spirit and soul for the school year!  The weekend also reminded me that there is always time for fun, and a reminder to schedule individual time with my kids.  

Here are some of my favorite activities from the trip.  Try some or all of them the next time your daughter is asking for some "mom" time with you.

Make a meal together
My girls were earning their Simple Meals Junior patch on the trip, so they had lots of opportunities to cook meals.  They cooked lunch, dessert, and breakfast on their own as part of their patch requirements, but one of our favorite meals was dinner because all of the moms and daughters cooked together.  Try this at home some time.  Pick something simple (we chose spaghetti, meatballs, salad, and garlic bread) to keep frustration levels low and the fun meter high.  The conversation that flows and teamwork that ensues will keep you flying high the whole night.  

Arts & crafts
When is the last time you made lanyards or friendship bracelets together?  We did both of these, and also made SWAPs (a traditional Girl Scout pin craft).  My girls are old enough now, where I usually just set out the supplies and let them do the crafts while I make dinner or whatever else is on my to-do list for the day.  At the retreat, I actually sat down and did the crafts with my daughter.  It was so much fun and reunited me with my inner girl who used to love doing that stuff as a kid.

Go on a hike
I live in beautiful Southern California so I am outdoors a lot, but often by myself while I walk the dog, exercise, or run errands while the kids are in school.  During our weekend, we took a fun scavenger hunt hike, with stops along the way for pictures together.  I loved this time with my daughter, chatting and appreciating nature at the same time.  She loved looking for the nature items on the scavenger hunt.  After doing this on the trip, I am thinking of doing a Sunday morning walk on a regular basis with my kids individually.

Be a star
What retreat is complete without a talent show?  My kids put on shows for us all the time.  In our show at the retreat, the moms and the daughters put on acts together.  From coming up with what to perform, to practicing it together, and then actually performing, lots of bonding took place.  And the girls loved it.  Seeing their moms be silly and have fun goes along way.  During your next family night, put on a talent show for the rest of your family.  I guarantee the whole family will be into it!

Snack Duty!

School is in session, and if you have kids, that means snack duty isn't far away.  Between Girl Scout meetings, soccer games, and after school activities, snack sign ups are filling up my calendar.  I like to keep it fun and healthy when it comes to group snacks, while also giving the kids a special treat.  Here are a few ideas for your next snack attack!

Fruit kebobs
These are super easy to make and the kids love them.  Cut up bit size pieces of apples, pineapple, or watermelon (I ask my kids what they'd like), and skewer onto sticks with strawberries and grapes.  

Bagel sandwiches
Slice mini bagels and fill them with nut butters or vegan cream cheese and fruit.  This also works with hummus and veggies like cucumber and tomato.  If you are able, you can lay out the spreads and toppings and let the kids make their own, instead of pre-assembling.

Crackers and spreads
It's my vegan take on "cheese and crackers" that come in those pre-packs.  Serve stacks of crackers alongside spreads like hummus or peanut butter.

Popcorn
Fill mini bags with fresh popped popcorn.  Bring along shakers of seasonings such as cinnamon sugar, vegan parmesan cheese and nutritional yeast for the kids to flavor as they like.

Chips and salsa
Purchase little containers from Smart and Final and fill with salsa.  Place in a small paper bag (you can find them in the $1 section at Target some times) with tortilla chips and you have a fun snack with lots of crunch.  You can also do this with pita chips and hummus, or veggie sticks and dip.

Popsicles
My kids love Otterpops.  Big Sticks would work great too.  Be sure to bring wipes!

Rice crispy treats
I made a batch of these with Dandies vegan marshmallows and dairy-free chocolate chips for a soccer treat earlier this month.  They were a huge hit with the kids.

Snack Mix
Make your own sweet and savory blend of pretzels, nuts, dried fruit and chocolate chips - or bring the ingredients and let the kids mix up their own!

What to Eat and Decorate for Sukkot This Year

Sukkot starts this Wednesday and it is the Jewish festival of giving thanks for the fall harvest.  It is a great time to reflect on the abundance in our lives, which also gives me great cause for a celebration!  Each year, my family erects a sukkah (a temporary "dwelling") in our backyard, where we decorate and eat in it with friends and family over the course of a week.

Check out my Pinterest board for some great ideas on decorations to put in your sukkah.  We have done everything from paper chains and paper cut-outs, to faux and real fruit over the years.  For this year's decorations, my board has so many ideas, I am not sure what to pick, including paper lanterns, decorated paper leaves, and sun catchers.

And no VeegMama celebration would be complete without food!  We have a couple of gatherings this Sukkot.  Here is what I plan to serve.

Sukkot Shabbat Menu
Quinoa Salad - Click here for the recipe.
Tofu kabobs

Potluck Sukkah Party
Make-your-own Pitas - with various fillings including a chickpea salad, seasoned tofu, spreads, and veggies

Moroccan Potato Salad with Kale and Corn - Click here for the recipe.

Saffron Rice - Click here for the recipe.

Jewish or not, I hope you find inspiration to celebrate with your own fall harvest this week to enjoy the bounty of our lives!

The Hardest Word

With Rosh Hashanah coming up next week, I have been thinking a lot of about the word "sorry" and teaching my kids not to just say it, but to feel it.  During the 10 days between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, it is my job as a Jewish mother to think about what I have done the past year for which I am sorry and apologize, and encourage my children to do the same.  As a mother of three, I know how easy it is to get my kids to say "sorry," but to feel sorry is another thing altogether.  Empathy is a tough thing to teach but the High Holidays are an annual opportunity for me to try.  

I came across this great article on Kveller.com by Meredith Jacobs.  She offers some great thoughts on the topic and suggests a book (Tashlich at Turtle Rock), in which it describes a family's annual ritual to go on a nature walk, where they cast away their sins and make promises for the upcoming year.  I found it so inspiring that I plan to do something similar with my family this year.  Click here for some similar activities that you can do to create such a ritual at home.

In the end, we must do sorry, not just say sorry.  Having compassion for others is taught as much as anything else.  Click here to read my post about creating compassionate children, with a list of things we, as parents can do to teach our children empathy.

6 Ideas You Must Try If Traveling With Kids

I have been traveling with my kiddos since my first child was six months old (my oldest is now 9, my second is 7 and my baby is 4).  We have travelled at least twice a year since I became a mom.  My husband and I love to travel and believed the best way to foster that love in our children was to indoctrinate them early!  We also passionately told ourselves we would continue our lives as we had before our kids came along: they would adapt to our lifestyle, not the other way around (...yeah, that kind of worked!).  With these attitudes and my type A personality, it is no surprise to me that all of three of my children are fantastic travelers.  Truly, it is a pleasure traveling with them.  I am proud of their ability to entertain themselves on planes, adapt to different time zones, and settle into a hotel room as their "new home" for a few days or weeks.

Still, I cannot give these great kiddos all of the credit...I must give myself a little pat on the back for the strategies and routines I have in place that definitely contribute to the travel bliss we experience.  Here are some ideas that have worked for our family, that I hope will contribute to the same bliss among your families.

1. Write a pack list: I have channeled the SVP in my past life to create a packing "spreadsheet" of sorts that categorizes and itemizes the things I need to pack - from the number of underwear for each of my children to my magazines.  I have sections for clothing (segmented by person), carry-on items, sundries, and entertainment.  It is a comprehensive list that I have adapted for different trips and saved on my computer to update and re-use again and again.  When I go to pack, I simply print it out and go down the checklist.  Packing has never been easier!

2. Create activity carry-on bags: I love these bags.  I take pure joy in planning the treats, activities and toys I will fill in these personalized bags for each of my munchkins.  There are three keys to success with these bags:

• Use a personalized or easily distinguishable bag for each child.  You don't want bags getting mixed up or things getting tossed (or misplaced) in someone else's bag (recipe for sibling fighting).  I use personalized Land's End bags that were gifted to my kids.  They are sturdy, stylish and functional.

• Customize the bags for each child.  I fill these bags with activities and games that are specific to each child's interest.  Klutz, the $1 section at Target, and The Dollar Store are great places to shop for goodies.  Madlibs, Bendaroos or Wikki Stix, and Play-doh always make the bag.  I also include a few treats that my kids don't normally get to eat (a bag of M&M's, fruit leathers, or gummy treats) as a nice surprise and a good way to pass a grumpy stage during a flight (or car ride).

• Surprise them.  The kids eagerly anticipate what they will get inside of each of these bags, but do not get to peek until they are on the plane, in the car, or train.  It keeps their enthusiasm high and also guarantees that no one will be bored with any of the contents.

3) Make a snack carry-on: I find everyone is happier with food (including me!).  I pack a cooler bag full of treats and favorite food items for the plane, car, or train ride.  I am more relaxed knowing that I have something nutritious and guaranteed to please at the ready whenever one of my little ones says, "I'm hungry."  

4. Throw a collapsible laundry hamper into your suitcase: I found these great storage containers from The Container Store that I use as travel laundry hampers.  They double as hamper and basket when I am lucky enough to have easy access to a washer and dryer where we are staying.  These storage containers are sanity saviors with all of the dirty clothes that can get thrown around a hotel room or timeshare.  I have one for the kids and one for me and my hubby.  It keeps things clean and organized.  I just love these containers!

5. Stock an activity and snack duffle bag: I am pretty efficient when it comes to packing (if I do say so, myself!).  I pack the kids in one suitcase and me and my husband in another.  Aside from those two suitcases, I have found that it is best to pack two additional duffle bags - one for snacks and one for games and activities.  With three small children, my husband and I choose to stay at timeshares or condos (versus a hotel room).  A kitchen is critical with small children if we don't want to spend a small fortune on meals at a hotel for breakfast and lunch.  Also, it helps with the early risers kids can be and the habitual "I am hungry" call that never seems to wane.  In order to be efficient and economical, I fill a duffle bag with favorite snacks and healthy items that are regulars in our household so that I can stock the pantry at our vacation spot as soon as we get there.  It saves time and money.

I also pack an additional bag full of board games, cards, books, DVDs, water toys, etc. that will keep us all entertained during our trip.  It keeps all of these items organized in one place.

6. Pack a collapsible tote bag: I purchased a few of these bags from Thirty-One.  I LOVE them.  Once I get to our vacation spot, I fill it with water toys and other items for sitting poolside.  Then, I tote it out every day, never having to think twice where the kids left this or that.  So great!

These are some of my organizational tools for success.  Please share if you have something that works great for your family.  I hope you are getting in some good travel this summer.

My Dad, My Hero

I am a lucky girl.  Blessed, actually.  You might want to argue, but I have the best father a girl could ever ask for.  Here's just a few of the reasons why:

• He's my biggest fan - He lights up every time he sees me.  Literally.  No matter what I do, he's always there to cheer me on.  He makes me feel like the most special person in the world.  And he means it.  Like really means it.

• He loves my kids with everything he has -  It doesn't matter what is going on in his life or how he is feeling, my dad plays and interacts with my kids like it's the last day he'll ever spend with them.  I admire that so much about him.  He treats each moment with them as gift and he lives it to the fullest.  Actually, he did the same with me as a kid.  

• He's always there for me - It was school projects when I was in grade school.  In high school, he was my cheerleader when I was on the field cheering.  In college, he let me spread my wings as a foreign exchange student and later move across the country to grad school.  He's lent me money, given me gifts I can never repay, and been the rock that catches my fall.  I am a full grown woman now with a family of my own, and he's still around to take out my trash cans when my husband is away on business, change my lightbulbs, and cook me dinner when I need a "night off."  It doesn't matter what I need, my dad is always there at my every request.  I know I can always count on him, whether I ask or not.  

• He's created family traditions that will endure generations to come - My dad is so good, he doesn't even know it.  He has built tradition and legacy sub-consciously.  My family will forever be indebted to him for his "Baba-isms," Taco Tuesdays, famous popcorn, and "volcano talks."  He will always be remembered for the love he gives and gives and gives.  

Yeah, this is a love letter to my dad, the first amazing man in my life...and then I found my husband, who possesses all of these same qualities.  I guess it is no surprise that I married a man like my father in so many ways (of course, just different enough so things aren't weird!).  I guess I am doubly lucky and blessed.  And I know I am not the only one out there.

Here's to the fathers who give so tirelessly of themselves for their children; who love with everything they have and then some; who walk the Earth and back to make the world just a little bit better and more special for their family; who provide a haven for their children that no one can every take away; for making us feel like the most special people in the world that we actually believe it and go on to do amazing things that we never thought possible; for giving us gifts that we can never repay - like unconditional love and family values; for setting the bar for the stellar men that we will some day marry.

Here's to you, Daddy.  You are my hero.