Mindful Parenting

Mindfulness has become a very hot topic these days.  I hear it often as a buzz word in the health and wellness community.  I personally love my subscription of Mindful magazine, reading it cover to cover each month.  I am familiar with mindful topics surrounding self-care, stress management, and even nutrition, but I was recently interested to hear it applied to parenting. 

I wanted to learn more about this topic, and luckily have an expert right in my own backyard!  Bahar Rinsler, is a psychotherapist who just happens to be one of my best friends.  She regularly conducts presentations in Los Angeles on this topic, leading parents through exercises to achieve more mindfulness in their parenting.  I invited her to share some of her wisdom with us today.

VM: What is mindful parenting?
BR: Mindful parenting is the practice of responding to your children instead of reacting to them at any given moment.  In order to be able to be a mindful parent, one has to engage in bringing her awareness to the present, paying attention to what you are doing or seeing and how you are feeling about it without judging yourself for the thoughts and feelings.  When we bring this attention to our time with our children, we are better able to make appropriate decisions about how we wish to engage with our kids.

VM: What are 3 things parents can do today to start being more mindful?

BR: Three things parents can do today to cultivate their ability to be more mindful are:

Play or hang out with your kids for at least 20 minutes without any distractions on your end, while following their lead.  Enter into their world for a bit and be present to the experience.

Eat breakfast or dinner as a family.  Mindfulness as a parenting practice is about connection.  Ask your kids what they look forward to for the day or about their best and not so great parts of their day.  

Stop time traveling.  Most adults spend the majority of their time thinking about either past events/upsets or future worries/to do lists.  When you catch yourself doing that, bring your attention back to the present and what is right in front of you.  

VM: What do you see as the biggest challenge parents face in trying to be more mindful and what can they do to overcome it?

BR: A big challenge for parents in trying to become more mindful is judging themselves harshly for not getting it perfect! Mindful awareness is cultivated over time.  When you are mindful, you are activating your brain's prefrontal cortex and creating new neural pathways.  With continued practice, these neural pathways will become more favored by your brain and you will slip into states of mindfulness automatically.

VM: Being mindful is a family affair!  Do you have any strategies for teaching our children to be mindful?

BR: An easy way to cultivate mindfulness in children is by having them focus on what they are grateful for and what they are noticing during their day.  Every day you can ask your children questions like "Who was a good friend to you today?" or "What new thing did you notice on your way to school today?"  

VM: You are a working mom of two, who practices what you preach!  Do you have a daily practice or "go-to" ritual to keep you on track to be a mindful parent?

BR: My daily practice of mindful breathing meditation helps me in my desire to be a more mindful parent.  It is simple to do and I often do it while waiting in the car for my kids at school.  I set the timer on my phone, close my eyes and begin paying attention to my breath.  When my thoughts wander, I gently bring my attention back to my inhalations and exhalations.  This meditation refreshes me.  I feel like I've had a little vacation during my day.

VM: Are there any resources you can recommend for parents who want to learn more about this topic?

BR: There are wonderful books on this topic for parents.  My favorites are The Whole Brain Child by Dr. Dan Siegel and Mindful Parenting by Kristen Race.

VM: I am on a quest to live the "good life" in every sense of the word.  What does the "good life" mean to you?

BR: The "good life" means living authentically and with awareness of all the delights that surround you in your life.

VM: Can you share your favorite quote?

BR: "Think of all the ways that life conspires for you every day." Rabbi Naomi Levy

Bahar Rinsler, LMFT is a licensed psychotherapist in private practice in Beverly Hills.

You Are What You Think

I recently read E Squared: Nine Do-It-Yourself Energy Experiments That Prove Your Thoughts Create Your Reality.  As a big believer in the Law of Attraction, I was already biased toward having a successful experience with this book.  However, as the author, Pam Grout, mentions in her first chapter, we may believe that there is a higher power or Universe available 24/7 to bring us what we desire, but we don't really believe it.  We take it for a coincidence or some special "magic."  She was speaking my language, and I wanted to prove to myself that I believe in the Universe and was going to start manifesting my desires now.  This book did just that.

About 60% of the experiments worked (I didn't do two of them), and after analyzing the ones that didn't, I realized I either was not specific enough with my intention, or I waffled in my desire.  My favorite was the experiment where we had to ask for a gift within 48 hours.  I set my intention and was awarded the next day with a surprise visit home from my hubby who was supposed to be gone for the evening.  I fell ill that afternoon, so it was literally a godsend to have him home to cook dinner, put the kids to bed, and take care of me.  TLC is the best gift ever!

There was another experiment where we had to manifest a message to someone else in a different place than ourselves.  I chose a friend I haven't heard from in over a year.  Within hours, I started receiving Facebook status updates from her in my feed (something I had not received in the past).

Then, there was a question we had to ask and set the intention to receive an answer on it.  I asked guidance about a book I am working on, and the next day, sure enough, I did receive an answer.

I was less successful with the weight experiment.  We were to send positive energy to our food before eating it and watch our weight drop around 3 pounds over the next two days.  Unfortunately, I had no success here, but this is where indecisiveness comes into play. Although, I was sending positive energy while I ate, I still held guilt while I indulged in a treat or a glass of wine.  The Universe rewarded me with no weight loss.  

I really enjoyed this book.  Overall, it reinforced the power of intention, something I already believe in strongly and practice daily.  It reminded me to stay the course and believe in the power of the Universe to manifest our desires if we would only ask.  It further cemented the idea that my thoughts create my reality and motivated me to start thinking, dreaming, and asking for what I want now; to focus on what I truly desire and let those thoughts guide me to the life I have always dreamed of.  

What are you thinking about today?  Don't waste another single thought!  Manifest them into your desires now! 

Why Seeds Aren't Just For Birds!

Are seeds a daily part of your diet?  If not, you are missing out on some fantastic benefits for yourself.  They are protein rich, full of important nutrients like fiber, calcium, and iron, to name just a few.  In addition, seeds offer such goodies as diabetes prevention (flaxseed), weight maintenance (chia seeds), and cancer protection (sunflower seeds).  Sprinkled in salads and vegan bowls, as well as mixed in soups and baked goods, seeds are a simple way to boost up your daily nutrients and give yourself a little extra preventive health love.

But, don't take my word for it, check out this great guide on seeds that I found in last month's issue of Real Simple, and read below for some of the ways I use my favorite seeds.

Chia seeds - I use these as a thickening agent in smoothies, shakes and baking.  There is so much you can do with chia seeds!

Flax seeds - I like these sprinkled in a salad, but also use them mixed with water as a congealer in baking.

Hemp seeds - This is my favorite seed!  I sprinkle them on salads and toss a few into my vegan bowls.  Hemp Hearts is my go-to brand.

Pumpkin seeds - These add some great crunch to any salad.

Sesame seeds - Sprinkled on soba noodles and rolled in vegetable sushi, I add these seeds to anything I make that falls into the Asian category.

Sunflower seeds - Another great addition to any salad, especially kale, they also make a great vegan cheese when combined with almonds.

How do you like your seeds?  Share the seed love in the comments section below!

5 Things I Didn't Expect From My Bikram Yoga Practice

I have always loved yoga, but only recently began practicing Bikram Yoga.  Also, known as hot yoga, Bikram Yoga is a Hatha Yoga practice that involves 26 postures in a specific sequence that works every part of the body, while providing the internal organs, veins, ligaments, and muscles everything needed for optimum health and function.

When I started Bikram Yoga last July, I expected increased flexibility and endurance, even a bit of weight loss.  Having practiced regular yoga in the past, I was no stranger to the benefits of yoga.  I didn't, however, expect the multitude of other "gifts" that my Bikram practice has given me.  Check these out:
  
1. Softer, clearer skin: As a vegan, I often get compliments on my skin.  It is one of the superpowers that come with a plant-based diet, but my skin seemed to kick itself up a notch once I started Bikram yoga.  

2. Smoother lips: I experience variances in dryness and chapped lips living by the beach.  It is a minor blip on my "things about my body I don't like" list.  I hate "peely" lips.  Lo and behold, I started noticing that my lips peeled less and were moister once I added in Bikram yoga into my fitness routine.

3. Silkier hair: Yes, apparently sweat helps build healthy hair!  Seriously, I have experienced shinier, silkier hair as a result of my practice.

4. Reduced cellulite: This makes sense given that Bikram Yoga releases toxins and wastes through the organs of elimination.  I just didn't expect it to be so dramatic or to happen so soon.  I notice it most on my legs, but have also seen an improvement in my tummy.

5. Increased energy: Honestly, I didn't think this was possible with my already supercharged status, but on the days that I practice Bikram yoga, I am ignited even further.  I think it may have something to do with the 15-20 minute meditation I do right before class, but I can't be sure.

What are you waiting for?  Get these five benefits for yourself and try out a Bikram Yoga class today.  It truly has been one of the best things I have done for my health and fitness.

Creating A Sacred Space

While reading Denise Linn's Soul Coaching last month, one of the assignments was to create a "sacred space" - a space that honors the sacred aspects of life, sort of like an altar or temple that can assist you on your journey towards peace, love, joy and all of your other desires in life.  It is not necessarily religious, but rather something that connects you to Source, Universe, or whatever name you have for the higher Being that connects us all.

I dug this assignment.  Count me in for any opportunity to create a tranquil, personal space for reflection and meditation!  It was actually a great excuse to makeover the space in my bathroom I already had.  It had lost the initial luster I created for it years ago and as such, I was using the space less and less.  Within just 15 minutes, I recreated the space with a few things I already had around the house.  Now, I use it daily to do my morning ritual and meditate.  I also come to this space any time I need to go inward, reflect on an issue, or calm my nerves.  I love my new space!

Here are my quick and easy steps to create your own sacred space.

1. Find a location.  The space does not need to be large.  (Mine occupies only half a bathroom counter.) No matter the size, it should include some type of table, counter or flat surface upon which you can place objects/items that you consider sacred.  

Something else to keep in mind when choosing your space is the location in your house.  It should be somewhere private (or that you can make private with either a room screen or by shutting a door).  It should be an area that feels calm and tranquil.  I placed mine near a window directly facing the ocean, because the ocean soothes me.  

Make sure you have a stool or cushions nearby so that you can access the space easily whenever you want, and that you are comfortable.

2. Gather your objects.  These can include books, affirmation cards, candles, crystals or stones, statues - whatever is meaningful and special to you.  

3. Pick something from nature.  Bringing nature into the space is helpful to connect us to our higher Being and remind us of our Creator.  I used sand and seashells in my space because that's what I connect to most in nature.  Maybe you love flowers.  Keep a vase with fresh blooms in your space.  If you love the mountains, perhaps a bowl of pine cones speaks to you.  A terrarium with succulents would also work well, as would a plant or anything else that represents nature to you.  

4. Arrange your objects.  This the fun part!  Move your things around until they are displayed exactly how you want them.  

5. Use and enjoy your space daily!

I would love to see your sacred spaces.  Email them to me at veegmama@gmail.com or Instagram them with the hashtag #VeegmamaSpaces.

Probiotic and Enzyme Salad

I have been following Kimberly Snyder's Beauty Detox Solution for almost two months now.  The crux of the plan is on-going cleansing by incorporating probiotics, digestive enzymes, and raw, cultured veggies into your diet daily.  I have a favorite Wildbrine's Red Beet and Red Cabbage Sauerkraut salad that I was eating (1/2 cup with dinner), but it was getting a bit expensive.  Kimberly shares a Probiotic and Enzyme Salad in her book, but I admit that the idea of fermenting my own veggies was daunting.  After looking at my growing grocery bill, I decided to give it a try.  It couldn't have been easier and the salad tastes great!

Here's a step-by-step rundown on how to do it yourself, and click here to watch Kimberly do it herself.

Probiotic and Enzyme Salad
You will need four 24-ounce clean glass jars (I used Ball mason jars) that have been sterilized by dipping them in water that has been boiled.

Base Ingredients:
1 medium head green cabbage, shredded in a food processor or finely sliced by hand
Leave 6 of the large outer leaves to the side, itact

Liquid Brine Mixture Ingredients:
4 cups water
4 inches gingerroot, peeled and grated
1 tablespoon unpasteurized miso paste (can be purchased at Whole Foods)

Directions:
1. Place the shredded green cabbage in a large mixing bowl.  
2. Blend the Liquid Brine Mixture in your blender until smooth, and pour over the shredded cabbage.  Mix very well.
3. Pack the mixture into the sterilized glass jars.
4. Use a wooden spoon to really pack the mixture in tightly.  Leave 2 inches of room at the top of the jars so the salad has room to expand.  Fold a few of the outer cabbage leaves into very tight rolls, and place them on top of the mixture to fill that 2-inch space.  Tightly close the jars.
5. Leave the jars in your pantry for 5 days.  Be sure the room temperature is around 65-70 degrees.  If it is slightly cooler, wrap a towel around each jar and keep in the pantry.

5 days later...
1. Remove the outer cabbage leaves and discard.
2. Move the jars to the refrigerator (which slows down the fermentation process).  Bubbling is a good sign that healthy probiotics are teeming.
3. Unveil your Probiotic and Enzyme Salad and enjoy at least 1/2 cup at dinner every night, and also at lunch, when possible.  

Once the seal has been broken on each jar, the salad will keep in the refrigerator for up to 1 month.

What's Your Word?

Flipping through a magazine earlier this week, I saw this ad.  It is for Special K cereal, but that is not what caught my eye.  It was the consumer insight behind the #1 New Year's resolution to lose weight. 

It reads: "This year, pick a word.  Not a number."  

And the scale reads "joy."

Brilliant!  This ad is a great reminder to be kind and loving to ourselves (and each other).  I mentioned in my weekly newsletter (sign up here) a couple of weeks ago, that I have been tackling my health, weight loss, and writing goals with great success - and I am having fun (not always the case when I am in "achieve" mode).  Instead of being strict and rigid in what I eat and how much I exercise (what I normally do), I have approached my goals from a place of love and joy.  I don't always get it right, but this past month and a half, I have tried to be kind and loving to myself.  I have been more aware of what I need at a particular moment and have practiced forgiveness (of myself) for my missteps in all areas.  I have held the word "joy" (that actually is my word) close to my chest and kept it as my guiding light in doing anything.   

Today, on Valentine's Day, I thought this was a great ad to share.  What is your word this year?  How do you want to feel today - and how do you want to feel when you achieve your goals?  It does not have to be hard to work hard.  It does not have to feel difficult to accomplish a difficult feat.  It is supposed to feel good.  Choose your word wisely and let it guide you to a wonderful, joyful place this year.  

Happy Valentine's Day!  There is only love!!!

The Perfect Bubble Bath

I have been dreaming about luxuriating in a bubble bath for the past three weeks.  With my husband's increased travel, my #2 and #3 children's birthdays within 5 days of each other, a trip to Yosemite, and a camping trip for my Temple all happening this month (help!!!) - I am close to maxing out.  Each morning as I get ready, I stare longingly at my bathtub, abandoned except for my dog's bi-weekly bath.  So I thought, what better time to pamper myself than Valentine's week?  Tonight, while my husband is out for work and after my kids are put to bed, this is my plan for the ultimate bubble bath and relaxation-pamper fest.

1. Draw the bath.  Lush's bubble bars are my go to bubbles of choice.  Almost all of them are vegan (and denoted easily to find).  Just crumble them under running water and the magic of their essential oils is unleashed into a perfect build up of bubbles.

2. Light the candles.  For me, lighting is essential.  There are so many great candles to choose from, but Burn candles are my favorite.  

3. Ice the champagne.  Govino makes a great champagne glass that is perfect bathside.

4. Play music (or not).  Tonight I am in the mood for some Adam Levine (He is People's Sexiest Man Alive!), but sometimes I relish the sounds of silence!

Will you join me?  Well, not literally, of course!  But, seriously, indulge in a bubble bath for yourself this week - and Happy Valentine's Day to you!

A Daily Meditation To Free Yourself

I used to hold on to a lot of stuff...

• Ideas about what I am supposed to look like and how I am supposed to behave 
• Expectations from others if I didn't do what they thought I should do
• Anxiety and worry about being criticized or judged
• Past grudges, hurts, and resentments
• Mistakes that I made
• The list goes on and on...

I have spent many years working on myself, searching for my inner calling, my life purpose, and true joy.  I have never been clearer in my journey than now, when I tell you that none of those things are worth holding on to.  It has been a gradual realization, but then suddenly, it became so clear recently. This baggage does not serve me in my pursuit of joyful living.  It is unproductive and it weighs me down (literally, my neck and shoulders ache from the weight of it all.)  It gets me nowhere further on my path.  In fact, it sets up roadblocks and detours that have slowed me down to getting me to right where I am now - happy and on my way.

So, I have started to let go, and in the process, let it go.  This is such a profound realization for me - let go and you will let it go.  I have reflected on this thought repeatedly during my daily meditations.  I have let go of anger and resentment, worry and anxiety, frustration and fear.  I may only release these feelings for 5 to 15 minutes during the day, as I meditate towards inner calm, but something more meaningful has started to change.  When I come out of my meditation, I am changed.

I have started loving, becoming nicer to myself, as well as those who had "wronged me" in my head somehow.  I find it easier to release judgment of myself for mistakes or choices I thought were wrong, and instead have begun to embrace what is.

Because...I want to feel good.  And this holding onto stuff business doesn't feel good.  No part of it does.  

Try the following as a mantra or affirmation daily:

Close your eyes.  Inhale deeply and exhale.  As you exhale, say "Let go."

Visualize whatever you are holding onto, and watch it release from your body, your hands, your existence.  Watch it dissolve and disappear until it is no more. 

Continue this several times.  Inhale and "let go."

Let go of the past hurts and the self-imposed limitations.   Release them and make room for love, joy, and laughter.

What are you holding on to that is limiting you from living the most joyful, fulfilling life you could have?  Whatever it is, let go of it now.  Free yourself and make room for much joy to replace it.  

Something Powerful To Start Your Day

I am a creature of habit.  I like order, routine, and schedules.  Recently, I've used this fact about myself to create something powerful and spiritual: a morning ritual.  After a month of practice, I am basking in the light of a start to the day that energizes and ignites me.  It is quite simple, actually.  Just a few, basic actions that I do every day, in the same order, day after day.  It is quiet, still, reflective time set aside for myself that I guard as sacred (My family can attest to this when they rise earlier than normal and interrupt this time!).  

The impact of my morning ritual has been tremendous.  I now greet the day with enthusiasm and zest, as opposed to disgruntled reluctance to pull myself out from under the covers!  I am calmer as the hurriedness and busy-ness of my day picks up.  I am also more focused on my goals and tasks set aside for the particular day.  I am more productive.  I am happier.  I smile more.  I am more grateful and I express it more often.  I feel lighter, less stressed, less anxious, and less overwhelmed, in general.  

Anyone can create a morning ritual.  The key is to personalize a routine that wakens your inner greatness and revs your engine.  Choose things that feel good to you because if it doesn't feel good, you won't want to keep doing it over and over again.  Pick actions that come easily and leave you craving for more.  This is how a habit will form.

Ready to create your own morning ritual?  Here are few ideas to get you started.  May they inspire you to create a routine all your own that ignites your fire every day!

• Choose a soothing way to wake every morning.  This could be a sound, song, genre of music, recorded affirmation, etc.  Avoid the typical alarm buzzer...I mean really, how can we expect enlightenment and calm with such a jolt to our senses first thing in the morning?!!!

• Drink something light upon rising to awaken your digestion system slowly (for example, a cup of tea, hot water and lemon, a glass of room temperature water).

• Clear your head.  You could write your thoughts down in a journal, go for a run, make a list of everything on your mind, or all of the above.  The important thing is to dump whatever is on your mind and free yourself from anxiety and worry.  

• Meditate.  I have blogged about my enthusiasm for meditating several times.  Starting the day with such a spiritual practice connects you with the greater Being that is the Source of all your desires.  I believe that the closer we are all to this Source, the more joyful our lives, our world, and this planet will become.

Here's my morning ritual:

• Rise and have a cup of hot water with lemon.
• Read something inspirational. 
• Journal 2-3 pages.
• Meditate for 5-10 minutes.
• I also like to work some kind of physical activity into the routine when I have time - whether it be a specific exercise workout, a walk with the dog, or just a series of stretches, I find that moving first thing in the morning is just as good for my mind as it is my body.  

The whole routine takes 30-40 minutes (an hour - 1 1 /2 if I add exercise).  What is your morning ritual?

10 Ways To Detox Your Body

I have been in detox mode since January 1st.  Over-indulgence in sugar and alcohol over the holidays sent me over the edge on the scale!  I started with a juice cleanse for three days and followed up with some major cuts in both alcohol and sugar, as well as some other things.  I have been reading The Beauty Detox Solution and have made some "great feeling" changes to my diet and routine (more to come on that in a future post).  In the spirit of "good living," I thought I would share some of the new things I have been doing to implement on-going cleansing to my daily routine.

1. Start the day with a glass of hot water with lemon, followed by a glass of water and a probiotic.

2. Juice for breakfast.  I have been a juicer for a few years now, but I usually just juice for breakfast during the week.  I started adding breakfast juices to Saturday and Sunday and it feels great.

3. Start lunch and dinner with a large green salad and a digestive enzyme.

4. Cut out processed foods (no packaged snack crackers, chips, etc.)

5. Cut back on gluten.  I have switched many gluten products such as pasta, bread etc. with gluten-free alternatives or omitted them altogether.

6. Cut back on alcohol.  Sigh.  This has been a hard one, but my energy has soared and my waistline is thanking me!

7. Cut back on sugar.  I don't usually eat dessert often, but it peaked during the holidays.  I am going back to my old ways and limiting it to special occasions and events.

8. Have a glass of water and probiotic before I go to bed.

9. Add apple cider vinegar to my diet daily.  Whether it's in my water or in a salad dressing, I am trying to have a little bit each day.

10. Add fermented veggies (think sauerkraut and kimchi) to part of my dinner meal.  I have about a half cup daily.

Whew - that's a lot of stuff!  The idea is to get your body in an on-going cleansing mode, so detoxification is something you do daily to enhance your energy, beauty, and health.

One of my favorite bloggers, One Good Thing by Jillee recently posted some other great ways to detox.  You can read them here.

Has the new year got you in detoxification mode too?  Let me know what you are doing!

Get Happy With This New Course!

My favorite happy app, Happier, has something new to make us happier.  It's an online class.  I think the idea is brilliant: build a gratitude practice with daily reminders, insightful tips, and helpful advice.  The course is just $50.  What a great way to kick off the new year with a positive daily habit!

For more info on the course, click here.  To learn more about this app and why I love it so much, click here to read my previous post when I first introduced it on VeegMama this past summer.

Live The Life You Desire This New Year

Happy New Year!  It's a new day, a new year, and a new beginning for many of us.  How do you want to feel this year?  How do you want to feel when you wake up in the morning?  What do you want to feel as you drive to work each day?  How do you want to feel when you walk through your front door at the end of the day?  Let the feelings you desire guide your daily decisions and lead you to the joyful life you are meant to live.

There is no time like the present.  How do you want to feel?  Capture that feeling now.

Danielle LaPorte is my desire guru and motivational coach in this area (virtual, that is).  Once I started thinking in terms of how I wanted to feel (instead of what I wanted), my life started to change.  Small changes so far, but I can see how they are building into something bigger.  My perspective is shifting and people around me are too.  When I let my feelings guide me, I am more confident about what I want and more at peace with myself and my desires.

Doesn't it just make sense?  We do what we do, (the work we choose, the commitments we say 'yes' to, the exercise routines we endure, the family units and relationships we create), because we want to feel a certain way.  Instead of chasing another goal this year, I am going to focus on capturing a feeling.

If you are interested in doing the same, I highly recommend you get a copy of Danielle's new book, The Desire Map.

Click here for a great interview with Danielle and business coach, Marie Forleo if you need a little more information (and convincing).

Blessings for a joyful and prosperous new year, full of joy and all that you desire.

A Journal Entry A Day Keeps The Cranky Away

Exercise and meditation top the list of daily habits of highly successful and happy people.  May I also suggest keeping a journal?  If you are new to journaling, this is the perfect time of year to reflect on everything in your life that you have to be thankful for, (writing in my gratitude journal is one of my nightly rituals), as well as a perfect time to jot down your "resolutions" or hopes and dreams for the future.  

I have been a journaler for quite some time, starting back in the day when I wrote my heart and soul down in a diary.  My entries have come a long way from that confused, hopeful, and questioning teenager, but I know that writing down my thoughts daily helps me to clear my head, work out things that are causing me anxiety, and dream crazy thoughts.  I also find that my day is a bit brighter and I am much more joyful when I start my day with a journal entry.  I put down my worries and issues on the page, freeing myself to let go and just be for the rest of the day.  Sometimes, I work out the busyness in my head, but often, I am just letting go of whatever "noise" is crowding my head, giving joy and happy space to fill it up instead.  I feel lighter after I journal, as well as more focused and centered on what I aim to accomplish for the day.  

I set intentions in my daily entries.  I make plans with myself for how I want to feel and live.  I set goals for the day.  I talk to myself.  It is liberating.  I urge you to try it.

I teach a writing workshop to elementary school students, in which I encourage them to keep a journal. Below are some of the entry starters I give them to use in case they every feel "stuck" and don't know what to write about.  I share them with you and hope you will try a couple out yourself.  Happy journaling!

1. What are three things in your life that make you very happy?

2. How do you feel today?

3. What would you do today if time, money, and fear didn't hold you back?

4. List 5 things you want.  List five things you need.

5. Describe yourself in third person.

6. What 10 things give you joy?

7. What is the best thing that has happened this week?  The worst?

8. Write a love letter to yourself.

9. What is your favorite quotation?  Write it down.  Why do you love it so much?

10. Have an imaginary conversation with someone about something that is bothering you.

11. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?  Why?

12. What is your favorite thing about yourself?  Why?

Meet Myke Zykoff, LifeCare Specialist

Myke Zykoff is one of those people that makes you feel good.  You know the ones….  Their energy lifts you up.  They always say exactly what you needed to hear, (often when you didn't even realize you needed to hear it).  They always have something interesting to share, and you leave every encounter with them feeling better than you did before you were with them.  That's Myke.  

I first met him a little over a year ago when I started seeing him for some hypnotherapy sessions, (Wow!  These are awesome if you've never experienced one before.)  Since then, Myke has expanded his services to include a range of life care, including meditation, (he hosts a very affordable weekly meditation class in West Hollywood that I wish I could get to more), personal coaching, workshops, and audio classes, (love these).  He is great at what he does, and it shows.  As someone living his joy, he clearly stands out for me as someone living the good life.  I was oh so happy that he agreed to let me interview him for the blog and share some of the great stuff he does.


VM: What is Zykoff LifeCare and how is it different from traditional therapy.
MZ: The most important thing I like people to know about Zykoff LifeCare is that it's all about you. What do you want?  What do you need? What is the best possible version of you, you can imagine?  This is what we set out to accomplish. The work here is not about poking around in your past nor lingering in the "problem." We work to build a
bridge from where you are to where you want to be.  I consider this "action therapy." Over the years I've learned the only true problem that anyone ever has is misinterpreting the messages one's body is sending. Your mind and body are always working in your favor. Discomforts are your being's way of letting you know something's not right for you.
That's all. LifeCare is a practice for learning to understand the messages being sent and then how to take appropriate action.

VM: How or why were you drawn into this field? How did you get on your spiritual path?
MZ: Honestly, what really set me on my path was a moment, a few days before my mother's passing, sitting beside her on her bed. She barely had any energy left and I was feeling quite helpless in it all.  But she saw me differently. She placed her hand upon my leg, looked at me and said, "You're a good caregiver."  At that moment I did not understand, nor see how that could be possible. It took about a year and a half of me burying myself in my work that I finally realized she was right. I began feeling more and more the need to be of service. This is what I do now, thanks to my mother's insight.

VM: Can you talk a little about the services you offer- hypnotherapy, life coaching and meditation - and share how they can be used to help us to live more fulfilled lives?
MZ: My practice is really all about helping people get back on their path, get back to their joy.  Eventually I will only be offering one type of session, "LifeCare," that will incorporate everything I do dependent upon a client's desired outcome. But for now I do list three different personal services on my website: Hypnotherapy, Coaching and Meditation. My hypnotherapy sessions are best for people that feel a little bewildered by their life experience and seek to understand their behaviors and create dynamic life changes. My coaching programs are more for people who are quite clear on what they want but can't seem to be able to get themselves there or who may just want a little push to accelerate their results.  Meditation, well, that's for everyone. What I mean is, the approach I take to
meditation is not so much about clearing the mind as it is about understanding who you are in your world. In this work we focus on allowing one's inner voice to become louder than sound of the world around us. We already have all the tools within us necessary to live the lives we want. LifeCare Meditation helps us to know this is true.

VM: You said something to me during one of our sessions: "You always know." How can we become better at hearing our inner voice and following it?
MZ: First let me explain what I mean by that.  When it comes to what is best for you, your ease of being and your joy, you always know.  Everything you do you do because, in some way, it serves you. It feels good for you.  Otherwise you would not do it.  So something within you already knows.  Learning to follow that knowing, well, that's something
else, altogether.  To get better at this I say "come to class!"  My weekly LifeCare Meditation classes are all about this.  In these sittings we practice listening to our own voices, our own truths.  Here's a basic guideline for practicing this at home: begin noticing your feelings at all different times of the day.  Select a few random times and set an alarm to
remind you.  Then, when the alarm goes off, notice what you're feeling; happy, sad, confusion, anger, etc. This is the first step.  Then, once you take note of how you're feeling, tune your awareness to what you're thinking about. You'll soon begin to learn the correlation of your moods to your thoughts.  Now, here's the key to knowing if your thoughts are truly a product of your inner voice: If you're feeling good, your thoughts belong to you. If you're feeling anything else, your thoughts are not a match to you. They are not yours.  As you learn to distinguish your voice from the world around you you'll be better able to follow it and stay on your personal life path.

VM: What three things do you suggest people do every day to experience "optimal living?"
MZ: What a beautiful question.  To me, optimal living is about living into your own version of the world, not what they sell in the magazines and movies.  To get clear on what that means for oneself and to live into it, I recommend these three things: Meditate, Breathe and say "Thank you."

- Meditation, as we've already discusses, is key in being able to hear what YOU have to say. Sitting still reduces outside influence on the mind and allows what's inside to become more known. 

-Breathing is a simple way to call your self home. When you sit still before a meal, a meeting or at bedtime, and pay attention to how you're body is breathing, your mind lets go of all outside involvement (stress, anxiety and worry) and returns to your body. And
that's exactly where you want it if you desire to remain healthy and vibrant. 

-And then, there's "thank you." We typically only say thank you in immediate response to something being done in our favor. But what about the air we breathe, our hearts that beat and the water we drink?  There's so much to be thankful for, but we forget.  A practice of
saying thank you for everything you do have will keep one's ego in check and your feet on the earth.

VM: You offer some fantastic audio programs. Can you tell us about them and suggest one to start with for those who are new to your type of health care?
MZ: Thank you for saying so.  I quite like them, too.  The driving force for my audio programs, and the additional digital content I am developing, is to make personal, mind care affordable and easily accessible. Some people simply can't afford private sessions or may not have a schedule that allows for much time away from the home or office.  My
programs are designed to feel much like a personalized, private session. The content is universal in its appeal allowing it to apply to your most immediate life vantage point at the time of listening.  Every listen will activate new results.  As to which is the best to begin with, well, I suggest a quick read of their brief descriptions and see which one
seems like a match at that moment.  There is no particular order to follow.  But, if your readers would like a free program, send them to my website where they can download one of my favorites, Guide to Relaxation, and then they'll have a better idea of what these programs can do for them.

VM: As you mention on your website, many of us have become distracted by outside forces as to what we truly need to be fulfilled.  Is there a daily practice or ritual you could recommend to help us stay attuned to our true joy in life?
MZ: Yes.  And as you might guess, I am going to say MEDITATION.  It's, bar none, the best thing one can do to maintain well being, personal identity and their connection to joy.  Five minutes a day is all it takes.  Truly. However; I understand that for many it really seems impossible to sit still at all.  So for them I would recommend what I call
"bullet point journalling."  Instead of writing down all of your thoughts from the day, make bullet points of the highlights.  When we hold ourselves accountable for our daily actions we can discover the links we have to our frustrations and our joys.  After a week or so, you'll begin to notice a pattern emerging.  Once you see it, you can do
something about it.  Here, once again, "you always know."  Sometimes it just takes slowing things down a bit to catch it.

VM: I am on a quest to live the "good" life in all aspects of the word. What does the "good" life represent/mean to you?
MZ: The "good life" to me is a life without baggage.  To be more specific, the good life, is a life without self compromise.  Not the compromise of sharing a home or a life with another, but the compromise of living in someone else's shadow.  Many people walk around holding back on who they really are here to be because of what someone
else might think of them.  That's just existing, not living.  The good life is giving your self permission and freedom to walk your own path.  Indeed!

VM: Can you share your favorite quote?
MZ: My favorite quote has more to do with having it stuck in my head than anything else, but in truth, it does fall in line with all that I stand for.  It's by Oscar Wilde.  "The only way to be rid of a temptation is to yield to it."  We're here, in our human forms, to learn, to grow, to explore.  When we find ourselves intrigued by one thing or another it's in the
best interest of our soul's journey to explore it.  As many a deathbed quote we've heard… "I regret only what I never allowed myself to do."  We're here to live!

Thank you, Myke!  To learn more about Zykoff Lifecare, click here.  You can read more about Myke below.  

Myke Zykoff: A filmmaker turned healer.

Myke Zykoff HHP, C.Ht. is a healer, guide, life coach and teacher in and around the Los Angeles area with clients on several continents.  Although he is quickly becoming a leader in his field, it was not what he originally set out to do.  

His original plan was focused on filmmaking which he stepped into with fervor. Even before Myke completed his
undergrad studies at Emerson College in Boston, MA, he was already employed and working in the Hollywood film industry. Not long after graduating, his career was off and running, experiencing success as a producer and director of music videos and on a fast track for creating feature films.  That was, until he lost his mother to breast cancer.

"Nothing seemed normal anymore and making films didn't seem to make sense either." 
He found himself called to the healing world. "I wanted to become part of the solution for pain and suffering."  

He devoted his post graduate studies to healing work and at first became certified as a massage therapist and shortly after, a Holistic Health Practitioner. He was on a mission to understanding the language of the human body. Myke opened his first healing office, Zykoff Bodywork, and soon after, found his practice voted Best of LA, five years in a row. 

But the more time he spent helping people the more he discovered that being healthy and living a great life has more to do with what goes on in people's minds than anything else. "The mind controls every aspect of what goes on in the body. In order for an un-wellness to exist, the mind must allow it to exist."

With the gift of this insight he dove into studying, and becoming certified in, hypnotherapy and NLP. "These are two of the most rapid modalities for changing the rules for how we think."  

"My healing practice is devoted to helping individuals learn to retell their life stories in a more meaningful way."   He's learned that the majority of people on this planet have learned to hold false beliefs about themselves and the result is people living lives that are not satisfying or even, in some cases, the slightest bit enjoyable. "People tell awful stories to themselves and then live out their lives making them real." "When you change your story, you change your life."

Zykoff LifeCare is a unique healing modality incorporating hypnosis, NLP, handwriting analysis, body language and energy work to assist individuals in commanding the power of their minds, break through personal limitations and be able to amplify their personally desired qualities.

The basic tenet of Myke's practice is "Everything is Possible." All of his sessions are geared towards getting clear on what needs to change and then removing the perceived obstacles so that the change can happen.

Over the past 14 years Myke has helped more than one thousand individuals to live more joy-full and meaning-full lives. "This is not a job for me. This is my life."

If you would like to pursue a private session with Mr. Zykoff, please call his office at (310)275.7673. All inquiries are welcome and his consultations are free.